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01:25 a.m.
i seriously need to archive this super long page...but last time i did it, all my musings were lost forever in the ether. any of you pita-ers know why this happened? the "helpful" pita people haven't responded to my emails yet. anyone care to help me?

01:16 a.m.
i feel as though i am losing myself. i've turned into a person i don't know, and i'm not sure if i like her. i used to have passion. now i simply fizzle.

this "ain't it cool" news is old news, but it is new to me. miramax has bought the rights to one of my favorite books, Neil Gaiman's amazing Stardust. oh, please god, let it not be mishandled. but, rumor has it, they want gwyneth paltrow to play the fallen star. this is just an atrocious crime. kerry russell (felicity) looks more like what i'd imagined (acting skills aside). but perhaps gwyneth "i need to eat a sandwich" paltrow will get stardust exposed to a bigger audience. *sigh* nevertheless, i'll be there with a ticket in my chubby paw on opening night...

12:15 a.m.
i'm embarassed to admit it, but i wish janeane garafalo was my best friend. how silly, don't you think, to long for a celebrity friend? but she's so damned jaded and cynical...she really cracks my shit up. and i genuinely admire the fact that she doesn't give into the "hollywood machine." she wears what is comfortable and practical, snubbing her nose at the designer duds so many of those shallow waifs sport. in short, she drives the van.
i tried to find a link, but there are no good janeane pages out there. hmmmmmm...

peter sent me a nice email thanking me for linking to him. how very considerate. he "for shamed" me for not having an 'about' page. i should get on that very soon.

02:06 p.m.
exactly what i said when i saw the trailer. you'd think big budget hollywood could fact check their script. perhaps shave a couple dollars of jim carrey's $20 million salary.

12:12 a.m.
this makes me sick to my stomach.

11:31 p.m.
turns out my last two entries started with "turns out." she's not the writer.

11:22 p.m.
turns out my dreams about change, well, they meant of whole heck of a lot of nothing. the job was not for an internet instructor, like it said, but was instead a gig *selling* WebTVs. i left the "interview" early then snuck out and went home. i had a cheeseburger and a chocolate milkshake to cheer me up.
ugh. nothing ever works out for me.

01:19 p.m.
turns out my dreams about change may have been a premonition. yesterday, i sat at home all day feeling bored and sorry for myself, because i didn't have any money and i felt as if i was wasting the summer away. B. tells me to get off my ass and look for a day job.
so i do
i pick up a copy of the Daily News Journal and the Tennessean and start hunting through the "help wanted" ads. i jot down 15 or so prospects but the one i am most interested in reads:
Internet Instructor--$20/hr.

you can't beat $20 an hour with the perverbial stick, so it is the first place i call htis morning (okay, it was noon, so who's keeping track).
i get an automated message saying that the positions are to be filled through a cattle call-tpe interview, on a first-come-first-serve basis. i called just in time to hear that the next interview time was in less than an hour, so 6:30 p.m. was the last and only option. (Let's just take this time to thank the goddesses for small miracles that i wasn't scheduled at the hell that is Outback Steakhouse).
i'm pretty darned stoked about this oppurtunity at Internet Consultants Advisory Network. I just hope it isn't some sort of scam, or that i am too late and all the positions are taken, or some other atroscity. i have bad luck and/or bad karma and these types of mishaps always happen to me.
i've really got my hopes up...a computer job (yay!) making fat cash (double yay!!), which might lead to never waiting tables again (triple friggin' yay!!!).

So long tea urn cuts!

02:09 p.m.
i've dreamed the past two nights about change. two nights ago i dreamed i found this incredible apartment for very cheap, only to wake up to see the walls of my overpriced shithole.
last night i dreamed i went to harvard. i was a freshman again and the prospect was overwhelming. i had met two fantastic girls who were to be my roommates, and i spent the entire dream scheduling my classes for fall.
*sigh* i'm very bored with this stagnant life.

06:37 p.m.
i'm a horrible person. i haven't updated in a long time. i had every intention of blogging my butt off today, but *tada* i have my first official hangover. bachollorette party=drunken debauchery. there will be titillating links and plenty of them to come very soon...i promise.
(sheesh, as if anyone cares :)

01:26 a.m.
i'm so damn jealous. that would never, ever, ever, ever happen to me.

12:17 a.m.
i finally finished While I was Gone in one huge gulp this morning. it was my sole goal for the day, although there are piles of laundry to be done. it was fat and satisfying. i cried three times. (it was, you see, an oprah book club book) after reading it i felt all weird and depressed. the book had affected my mood!
my emotions are very fragile. i'm a big ole crybaby. at least i recognize my weakness.

after work today, i checked my messages to see that shelly had called...one of the nicest girls from work. she wanted me to work for her friday evening, and i was calling to say "of course i will, that's 10 more packages of ramen noodles for me" and to chat. so i remembered the number, cuz i'm smart like that and then dialed her up. it was about 10:30.
a sterile voice answered the phone is an awkward tone..."Hello?" i paused thinking it was one of those god forsaken answering machine messages that tricks you into beginning conversation, and then mocks you as it continues its greeting. nothing happened so i asked, politely asked to speak to nice, sweet shelly. then this BITCHHEAD screams "you are dialing the wrong number and you just woke me up!", then abruptly slams down the phone.
i stood there, mouth agape, at the rudeness of bitchhead.
so of course, i hit redial, forgoing the whole anonymous *67 thing, not caring if she knew my name, and yelled "now that you are up, i want you to know that your rudeness was highly uncalled for...have a good night!"
i'm glad i did it too.
p.s. turns out shelly wasn't at home

i cut my finger at work tonight on the lip of a metal tea urn. see blue bandage ("so we can see it if it falls in the food") in picture at right. can't wait for real job where there are no tetnus shot-inducing tea urns to clean.


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